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The Rare Door Into

by Justin Carter

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1.
Living among the little people is a lot like like living on a sinking ship. They conscript themselves to the body, always feeling as they should. Sweet little bottle of our soul Care too much for the other, going too far to please their need I satisfy my nature with my wounds, always seeking the grand old Granfalloon Sweet little bottle of our soul
2.
Baalzebub 06:17
See these gifts that I give to you? I give them with open arms. Leave me bleeding. Devil's wings, guide me to and through all the things that made you. Astigmatic mind, check the window. Drag me through the angled land. Stand, land. The future is organic. It bubbles up inside of me. Stand, land. I want to go home, but I don't know where to go. Where is my home?
3.
Leave me under this condition: you must go outside to see the stars. Once you've found one you like, you may venture a reason why I go on. Waiting for the prime conditions, what have we become? I am what you've been waiting so long for now It's your turn to step out of line and see what you have wrought here. And then find your mind. Sins of a father cast a long shadow Immortal mother, frameless as shadow And then find your mind stays going, still flowing, until you rest. Waiting for the one to leave me under the one. What have we become?
4.
Gestational savior, Jesus Christ, where are you now? Abandoned here without the wings of those who brought me here I don't know where to go. I think I've been abandoned. And though I came here on my own I feel as though I've been pushed to do something that I don't want to know about anymore, my gestational savior. Jesus Christ, where are you now? I am powerful. In a way, I am powerful, to the underling. I am powerful, aren't I? To the underling? In a way, I am powerful. I have it all. And I can resolve to go under. Tediously, we go into the light. Pretty little junebug, dying on the ground. Flittering and waving, instead of gunning to be found around town. Totally aware that I am powerful. I am power-hungry. I am powerful.
5.
Pointless wasteland behind me Something strong ahead realigns The rare door into another I grip the keys to what I've always wanted to find But you get away from me, don't you now? Get away from me, don't you Give into temptation Stroke my soul with hopeful notes, and aww It feels good to be with you right here right now I surely hope it won't go south No, it won't go south. Encasement of the self in the body of lies. There is nothing to say. Don't go looking for the way to define and to divide. Don't remind me what it's like. Those you love get away from you. Get away from you, get away from me and Give into temptation, stroke my soul with hopeful notes, and aww It feels good to be with you. Give into temptation, stroke my soul with hopeful notes, and aww it Feels goo
6.
Forgot the thing that I'm supposed to sing. Something about how the world is? Or oughta be? What was it? Where's my song? Chatterbug brain, the landscape blurs my foggy eyes and it becomes me. Schizo voices incense my song. Where's my song? We're here to help you give up to God and his men. To get you a little help for the cancer in your glands.
7.
Fish Wedding 10:20
Technically I'm licensed to wed these fish gathered here. I can make them meld anytime at all. Put them in a stew and meld their flesh. I am lost in a haze of medication. I push and shove through the fog. And though I make attempts to show myself, You can't reach me. I'm getting pretty tired of lying in my bed, waiting for the moments to end, lined up compiled in my head. I haven't yet seen the shape of the stars' alignment, Uninterrupted analog, frameless as the wind. Posting up in the corner, watching the stars align. Worshipping the Great Mortal Divine. Frameless Divine Mortal Lover. In the basement, where the little dolls hide, you will not remember what happened last night. In the basement, under the stair, you will not remember what became of you there. Reaching for my medication
8.
Forgery of a will beyond my instinct Pull myself out of this by the bootstraps Secret cosmic handshake and Everything falls into place. I perfectly see the world as it is. My foggy vision, cosmic vision. Dusky gaze pointed away, always away from the rapture. Face the dirt and sap the bodhi tree, idle on the ground. Will it, will it, will it but it won't. Sacred cosmic handshake and Everything falls into the place. And now, here's how Justin met the Wolf: Something caught up in your eye, you are caught in the stream of life. It will catch up with you and go at the speed of light. And now, here's how you are me: Everything Something caught up in your eye, you are caught in the stream of life. It will catch up with you and go at the speed of light.
9.
I am depressed. Thought it would have resolved itself by now, but I am depressed. I am depressed, but I thought it would have resolved by now. But it hasn't, and I am living in fear of living alone. I won't be surprised when I find I'm living a lie. It's too easy. Think too much. I think too much. Taking too much time to get around and recognize I think too much, and I talk too little. Every time the words come out absurdities. It's funny to watch me stumble around the block. Looking for the light in their eyes, in the eyes of strangers. Seeking the number one doctor-recommended source of pain. Looking for fire in their eyes is the only way I'll ever recognize it's too easy To go along with. You came on too strong and made it too apparent that you'd like to spend some time alone together so find a way to hide the pain from those you love.
10.
I used to think that I had something to say. I used to think that I had something to talk about with you. And I do hope to know what it's like to know. And I do hope to know what it's like.

about

Dedicated to the Yorick boys, Mike and Erik, for welcoming me into the fold and inspiring the Hell out of me.

All songs written by Justin Carter.

credits

released May 14, 2016

Recorded at Yorick Studio in Omaha, NE from August 2014 to April 2016.
Produced by Justin Carter and Erik Jarvis.
Mixed by Justin Carter.

See individual tracks for personnel listings.
Arrangements for tracks 1, 6, and 8 by Erik Jarvis.
Arrangement for track 9 by Phill Smith.

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Justin Carter Denver, Colorado

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